i can finish what i start

here is the final installation:


i can still make a model

an in-progress model of our next lobby installation:

i need a thimble.


i can make magic

friend: what are you doing?
me: sewing human hair onto a dead rat.

my life is never boring.

i mentioned RADicorns in a previous post. over the long weekend i finally had a chance to make my dream a reality. not too bad for my first go at it, but you know what they say...practice makes perfect. hopefully by christmas i'll be good enough to give them as gifts. because honestly, who wouldn't want one? they're so PRECIOUS.


i can make up the past

me and alfie started a new blog.

real art. fake history.

read it here: STUPID ART HISTORY


i can conquer the south

greetings from our annual family reunion in north carolina! once again reaffirming the fact that no matter how hard i try, i'll always be a city girl. and a career woman. i don't know how people can just sit around all day. BORING.

but i love my family, so that makes it all okay.


i can survive in the wilderness

i'm so happy that i just want to scream.


i can make lemonade

so, i tried my hand at taxidermy again. this time with a larger bird. i currently have a freezer full of pheasants that my cousins gave me to practice on. i started with the small ugly one first. i kind of botched the job, but mostly because i still don't have all the right tools. but now i know. so pretty much the only part i could keep was the head.

the only logical thing to do was turn it into a dagger and give it to my lovely dad for father's day:


i can still like this, right?

these beautiful photos were taken by the US Marshal's office. if you're interested in purchasing any of the items, they'll be sold in an online auction starting wednesday. more can be found here.

oh, and everything pictured above belonged to the Unabomber.


i can help a friend

I've been lucky enough to never have been directly affected by any of the 'please help yada yada do blah bitty blah' on facebook. my time, however, has come.

my friend cavin (one of the first people i met when moving to brooklyn a million years ago) has been in a serious accident and is in critical condition. like me, he has no health insurance. any donation will help and if you can't donate, please send some positivity his way.

i need my friend back in one piece.


thank you <3


i can walk in circles

does anyone want to go to the guggenheim soon to see Umberto Boccioni's "Will Smith in a Man-Rage"?

my boyfriend, Kazimir Malevich also has a few pieces in the show. so you should totally go.


i can haz one of each?

in honor of my lovely sister, who is now officially a vet tech!



"do i sing like a bird?" I CAN IF YOU WANT

side note: strangers with candy is the most hilarious show.

here is the new spring lobby installation at my job.

the poem says:
"my shoe is off.
my foot is cold.
i have a bird
i like to hold."
-dr. seuss

i can look at the stars

i got a car, so i drove upstate to my hometown with some friends to look at SUPERMOON. it was pretty big.

mccabe loves to fetch and no pond is gonna slow him down.

i can bounce back

pardon my lack of updates, but following a short stint of unemployment (during which i did nothing but eat baby carrots and hang out with my dog and play world of warcraft) i have managed to round up THREE jobs. and now im super busy. obv.

here is a quick recap of what i've been doing:

oh, and prettying the internet:


i can never have children

i nearly broke my ankle this weekend at my nephew Monster Truck's first birthday party. that's what i get for pretending to get shot down while running. NO ONE CAN DEFEAT OPTIMUS PRIME I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN BETTER.

anyway, kids are disgusting but these guys are pretty cool. ryan took all of these. he is only 3.


i can mourn the death of OB

i don't know if anyone else noticed, but my favorite tampons have vanished from the shelves. at first i thought it was just a drought my hood but then after some internet research i realized that this was a global catastrophe. but i think i've gotten to the root of the problem: JOANA VASCONCELOS

how could you do this to me?


i can see where i get it from....

this is a card my father made for my mother for their first valentine's day.

it might be the most hilarious thing i have ever seen for a few reasons:

-my dad is a mechanic, hence the underlined 'brake' not 'break'
-the cover illustration? the blood is a great touch
-this was written before my dad had fully mastered english as his second language
-PURE ROMANCE. i like your all or nothing attitude dad. WELL DONE.


i can live in a motel room for 4 weeks

i've decided to move to montana for 4 weeks this summer to go to taxidermy school. when i get back, i will have:
-2 fish
-2 birds
-1 live sized mammal
-1 rug
-1 wall mount
as well as everything i'll need to start my own tannery. i'm gonna make so much leather.

I am going to try to sell these items to help cover the cost of my tuition. the student housing is a motel 6. in the middle of montana. basically someone is probably going to taxidermy me. I'm dead as day.

additionally, i've stumbled across this artist Claire Morgan, who now i am basically obsessed with. she has an amazing fly sculpture that looks eerily similar to the one i was planning with my fly collection that someone THREW IN THE GARBAGE. who would throw out a box of flies!? obviously someone was saving them.

see more of her work here!